If the future is always a mere reflection of the past, then it goes without saying that this year will be rife with cliched Halloween costumes that you just might not be able to miss regardless of where you are or how you dress up. We took a good, long look back at 2010, and decided to help you avoid cliches and conjure up the best of the best and expel the worst of the tired and overdone.
Here is our top 2010 Halloween costume do’s and don’ts:
DON’T:
1. Don’t be Sarah Palin! Instead, try bewitching your friends as Christine O’Donnell! It’s topical, Tea Party and so spooky! And don’t forget to memorize the First Amendment before you go on TV to debate it!
DO:
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DON’T:
2. If you want to address this years tragic Gulf oil spill, don’t be crude! We suggest dressing like Snooki, JWoW or other Jersey Shore characters who use almost as much product as BP, but intentionally. After all, why splatter yourself in oil when you could lather it luxuriously over your body?
DO:
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DON’T:
3. If Halloween has you feeling blue, don’t go the Avatar route. We’d hate to blame you for inflating James Cameron’s already oversized ego. Think about smaller, happier times with the Smurfs, coming to a theater near you next year.
DO:
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DON’T:
4. If you are going to dress up in drag, we suggest you take your queues from Hot Aussie Courtney Act, and not man-grandma Meg Whitman.
DO:
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Lesbian DO:
5. Feeling like a kid at heart? Dress like Justin Beiber, but only if you are a lesbian. Gays, try whipping your hair like Willow Smith
Gay DO:
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Finally, the Double DO:
6. Finally, If you want to just make us happy and probably get laid, try dressing up like uber-sexy bearded Giants closer Brian Wilson, or his “neighbor,” “the Machine.” They are both sure-fire winners at any Giant gay Halloween Extravaganza!
Also DO:
GO GIANTS! HAPPY HALLOWEEN!
