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I stayed here once when it was Fife's and brunched here many times back then, and I really do miss the gay crowds. But now that it's Dawn Ranch Lodge and is catering to straights and weddings, it's still a nice place for a quiet cabin away from the parties at RRR and elsewhere. We thought it would be nice to go out elsewhere and then have a quiet place to come home to, and never felt intimidated or discouraged by the staff. I hesitate to reveal what I hoped would be our little secret, so don't tell anyone that cabin 302 is an amazingly comfortable, secluded hideaway for ~4 people.

The Rainbow Cattle Company has a special drink called a rootbeer float, similar to a long island ice tea in that they are both concoctions of different spirits. Both are served in ginormous mason jars (quart size, I believe) for a steal at only $8. The rootbeer float really does taste like the non-alcoholic namesake, but a caution for those who are lactose-intolerant: it does include cream. It has a smooth taste, and hardly seems like it includes any booze, but be careful: it packs a wallop and one drink will do you all afternoon. Fortunately, our bartender wisely asked us which of us was the designated driver. He stuck to club soda with a splash of cranberry.

First of all, it's almost pointless to review this place unless you adore karaoke bars, and I do not. But having been dragged here several times in recent months, I'm reviewing for all the folks willing to get passed that for the sake of their friends. Even if you can ignore the karaoke (and you can if you maneuver to the right places), it's still an incomfortable venue. Despite being labeled a gay bar since 1968, the year I was born, it's overwhelmingly straight. Mostly gaggles of girls in college drama departments who bring the occasional gay bff or reluctant boyfriend. It's way too crowded and the horseshoe bar in the middle of the room occupies way too much floor space. It's hard to get attention at the bar, only to end up with a relatively small/weak drink by Castro standards. And that's a major flaw, because seriously, the only way to halfway tolerate this place is to be way too drunk to notice.

Several months ago, my aunt and her family stopped by for dinner and she asked me if there was anywhere in the neighborhood where she could get a feathered boa. "Oh, sure," I said. "There's a hardware store just down the street." It didn't strike me until she started laughing how odd that was. But the truth is, Cliff's really does have a little bit of everything: hardware, lumber, paint, gardening supplies, kitchen supplies, toys, arts & crafts, drag accessories. The Castro is a pretty self-sufficient neighborhood, but mostly because Cliff's single-handedly rounds out most of the gaps.

Out of the ashes of the old dive bar The Expansion, briefly reincarnated as The Metro, comes another new spot in the Castro's refreshening nightlife: Blackbird. The decor is deliberately rustic chic, which could easily have looked like a stodgy bar my Grandfather would have gone to without the elegant touches that makes this probably the best decor of any Castro gay bar (even beating Trigger in some respects). I went once on a Monday evening, when it was pretty busy (on a Monday, no less!), and again on a Friday when it was jam packed. Nice place to meet friends and visit, but surprisingly easy to mingle despite the long bench and rows of chairs. Another excellent addition to the Castro.

One of the Castro's newest restaurants (replacing Askew Grill, but old-timers will remember it as the site of Josie's Cabaret & Juice Joint), Starbelly offers "California comfort food" seven days a week. We went for brunch and I found the open-faced fried egg sandwich (with starbelly bacon & two year aged cheddar) to be amazing. We plan to go back for dinner for a friend's birthday. They have an extensive beer and wine list as well as some specialty cocktails, but I could not tell if they had a full bar or not.

I went a few times years ago for Club Dragon, a Friday night event for Asian guys and their admirers, but it really wasn't my scene. Club 8 has a new marketing manager creating new events and partnering with other promoters, like Joshua J for "Big Top," and it's becoming a really fun venue. The club is an old Victorian house converted into a two-story club, with dance floors upstairs and down, three bars, and a covered side alley for smokers (or those who need fresh air). They are currently only open Fridays and Saturdays, plus every other Thursday, so be sure to check the club's website for the week's schedule and events.

Dined here a few times and have ordered appetizers at the bar, but this was the first time I had a chance to try the "All You Can Eat Pizza Night" on Tuesdays for only $10. (You can still order from the regular menu if you'd prefer.) They have five pizzas coming out in rotation, like a pizza version of dim sum. Our night included 4 cheese pizza, ham & pineapple, tomato basil, BBQ chicken, and a sausage/pepperoni. The slices are a little smaller, making it easier to sample a lot, but I still can't believe I ate SEVEN slices (getting the BBQ chicken and 4 cheese twice). Each one was awesome. They also have a nice wine list plus a full bar.

When the Metro occupied this spot, it was a quiet little happy hour/post-brunch bar whose main draw was the balcony. Now the new owners of the bar now called the LookOut are regularly creating new event nights to keep it fresh. Different forms of music, drag shows, trivia nights, charity fundraisers, jocks in jocks with jell-o shots, and some of the friendliest bartenders in the Castro. I've seen go-go boys on pedestals, in showers, and in cages (though usually there aren't go-go boys at all). Love that you can order from the adjoining pizzeria from the bartenders, and still love the balcony (though the seats are getting ricketty and maybe should be repaired or replaced).

Need I say more...?

You wanna go where everyone knows your name...

Do you know anyone who looks good in blue or green lighting? I don't. And the aquarium fish look so unhappy....

I didn't wash and dry my tight jeans on HOT so you people could watch television! The non-stop music and TV videos make the clientele stare up at the screens like turkeys in the rain.

The atmosphere resembles Badlands (with the non-stop videos), but there's more variety, and a more casual feel here, especially on the smoking-optional patio -- which can be quite friendly... A decent place to dance -- before it gets too crowded.

Big strong drinks, which might help to counteract the well-worn crowd and that funky smell...

The only place to really dance in the Castro, Badlands is hopping every night of the week. Whether or not you like the video music, or the somewhat nervous gay boys and the fag hags who love them, or not, is up to you...

On the corner of Castro and 18th, Harvey's is SF gay ground zero. But food and service leave something to be desired.

Nice, friendly local hangout for the 40+ Levis crowd. Monday is underwear night, decent DJ music, but it's not always pretty. On weekends, everyone I meet is from New Jersey!

This is a quiet, secluded, clothing-optional gay resort with a pool. But some of us could use a cocktail! A bit of a walk to town and the gay hot spots.

The new management has forsaken the gay clientele that was once Fife's, in hopes of attracting a straight crowd for weddings, etc. But the breakfast / brunch menu is quite gourmet.

While not a gay-owned establishment, the Riverlane Resort is a gay-friendly, centrally-located collection of cabins (with full kitchens), with a pool and jacuzzi (season-permitting). It's a basic, nice place to stay that overlooks the Russian River -- and 1/2 block from Safeway. Many units have patios, BBQs and views of the river. Walking distance from the gay hot spots, but a quiet place to retire for the night.

The Woods is a very low-key, quiet, gay-friendly place to stay. You can choose from multi-room suites with kitchens to the budget-priced bunkhouse rooms (totally acceptable). The large pool is clothing-optional (I option for Speedos myself) and it can be a nice break from the Triple R scene which can be more lively and noisy. Great, friendly staff.

The Triple R is a gay institution in Guerneville, a glorified motel where the action all happens (esp. on special event weekends). The rooms are clean and decent, but the pool party scene (Spring and Summer) and the late night bar crowd might make it a bit noisier than you might like if you're looking for a peaceful getaway. The restaurant and bar are both good and friendly.