Nine New Year’s Eve Hangover Helper Tips

Jewish funny-man bartender Yuri Kagan knows that drinking with the gays can end up as the worst kind of joke the morning after. The stand up comic is found most often tending to the ilk of well-spirited gays at San Francisco’s groovy Blackbird Bar, and is an alum at mega-twink tourist trap Badlands. We caught up with Kagan, who shared some tips for dealing with your soon-to-come holiday hangover.

Yuri Kagan recommends:

1. Keep drinking; No one likes a quitter.

2. Waking up next to someone you don’t remember meeting instantly cures or at least delays any hangover.

3. In Ireland it was said that the cure for a hangover is to bury the ailing person up to the neck in moist river sand. If you don’t have moist river sand handy, just bury them in disappointment and guilt. Ask any Jewish or Catholic friend how this works.

4. Ride a bus in any major city. This alone should kill that hangover instantly by making you reach for that vodka flask you hid in your jacket pocket.

5. Hydrate, hydrate, and hydrate, especially with a Mimosa breakfast.

6. Hangout with Lindsey Lohan. After hanging out with that mess, anyone will feel better about their life.

7. Watch E True Hollywood Story for a mandatory four hours, followed by drinking an entire pot of coffee and eating your hangover away. If the coffee doesn’t do it, you may in fact be dead inside.

8. Have a Bloody Mary–or five.

9. Look at yourself under any florescent light. The horror of it all will help you come to your senses quickly.

Yuri Kagan has performed at the Comedy Store in Hollywood, the Purple Onion in SF and Club Deluxe in SF.He can be seen at Comedy Off Broadway in Oakland Jan 28 and “the Marsh” for Marga Gomez Funny Mondays Feb 7th. You can read his blog is www.yurikagan.com.

Photo courtesy Badlands

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